Natural Born Feminist

Being an Egyptian feminist never fails to show you its ugly face.. or to be more frank, this is almost the only face you will meet ever since people decide to "honor" you with this "label". Once you get known as such, get ready to be bashed with all kinds of questions (a polite word for "accusations") like "Why do you hate men?.. Don't you think you are exaggerating?.. Do you want us to live like they do in the West?.. Are you married? " and (quoting the King of Siam) et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

The stereotype for a feminist assumes a certain scenario which goes as follows.. She was brought up in a miserable family, having to wash the dishes and cater drinks to her male brother.. Her father was probably a harsh man who used to beat her day and night, or deserted his family when she was young.. She probably was heartbroken in love, or met a man who cheated on her.. She's an envious spinister.. most probably her looks aren't good enough to attract men's attention... et certera, et cetera, et cetera.

Well, I'm always sorry to disappoint those who carry this sort of pathetic stereotype and trust so much. But, first of all, I'd like to say that I don't like to be called a feminist.. not because I became ashamed of the fabricated qualities associated with this term, or that it has grown notorious in our society.. but because it fails to express my aims and what I really seek to do. You cannot sum-up Fantasia in mere "feminist." That will not be an accurate description. I'd rather be called a "myth-slayer or a "folklore-deconstructor".. for that is what I actually do. If you would like to add the term"feminist" before either of them, though, it is absolutely fine by me.

Growing up with all those familiar accusations from people who try so hard to prove that I fit into their stereotype of that thing called "Feminist," has, nevertheless, caused me to reflect more on why I was different.. and to rephrase it according to pop culture, it would be "what was wrong with me?" Again, I apologize for disappointing them all, for I have discovered that nothing was wrong with me. And check this out.. I found out to be one of the rare cases of those who don't fight against nature. I am in complete harmony with who I naturally am and what my primary instincts dictate! People like me may be considered to be rare species in our world, but I believe I am just one among many, whom you might well call "Natural Born Feminists." Please allow me to elaborate, using my diary.

1. The Day I Broke My Doll:

I grew up in a loving, traditional Egyptian family. My parents, like all others, loved me so dearly, and thought that showing this love would be through grooming me into what society would expect a girl to be. As a kid, I didn't understand it, and I thought the role of parents was to prevent their children from doing what they wanted. For instance, when the Legos I had received as a gift for my birthday suddenly disappeared, I thought the purpose was to deprive me of my favorite toy. However, I later discovered that my mom was hiding them away because she didn't like to see me playing a "boys' game", besides the mess that the scattered pieces of Legos cause. Instead, she got me a Barbie doll, only to find it broken into pieces the next day. She thought I hated this particular doll, so she brought me a new one; and when its fate showed to be no better than the first, my mom didn't give up.. She kept showering me with loads of dolls, never having pity on them, even when she sees them, one by one, ending up as plastic spare parts. I told her that that was my way of playing with dolls, but she insisted that I should use them to play another game.. pretending that they were real people, combing their hair and dressing them and stuff. When nothing seemed to work, she complained to my father that I spoiled my dolls, and thus was unworthy of any more toys. What my mom couldn't understand was that not all girls love to play with dolls. Kids differ.. not according to their gender, but according to their characters, abilities and preferences. And what I didn't understand was her presistence that I play with a "dummy" (in the full sense of the word).

2- The Screwdriver:

As a kid, I hadn't known that exhibiting your talents was scary. I thought that parents would be proud of what their young ones could do, and should encourage them to be more curious and learn more about the world. I thought that being independent was a bless, not a curse.. and that showing everyone that you were able to do things on your own was worthy of applause. Oh how green I was! [sigh].. Anyway, I used to show off my skills in front of adults, especially my parents, with best of intentions.

One day I brought a screwdriver and started to unscrew our cassette-recorder to explore what lies inside. Yet, my dad made me feel as if this recorder was a bomb that would explode if I touched it! Needless to say, this didn't prevent me from seeking after what I wanted. A kid's mind is designed to be curious, constantly seeking after knowledge.. you can't stop this automatic mechanism just because you fear that a stupid machine will get out of order! So, I waited for the time when I was home alone, and I would get my dad's tools and open all of the electric machines at home, one by one, and I would take out the pieces inside, carefully remembering where each piece belonged, then see if I could assemble them all again in the same order. I applauded myself when I succeeded, since there was nobody present to witness this achievement. And when my parents came home, and turned on that same device, I would keep saying to myself "If only you saw it one hour ago!" and experience a sort of evil kind of joy :)

Years later, when our VCR went out of order, I couldn't keep myself from helping my dad who seemed so frustrated. I begged him to allow me to take my shot at repairing it. Of course, he was totally against it, but when I told him there was nothing to lose and that the technician was going to repair it anyway, he seemed to have been too tired already that he let me do it. He couldn't believe it when I actually fixed it! But I never confessed to him my long hidden secret. Up till today, my family depends on me when it comes to installing or fixing electric devices. They are satisfied to think it is a miracle, and I no longer seek to disturb their peace of mind.

3- A Lesson Well-Learned:

Being a female, you can not be proud that you're talented or that you're smart. People won't admire you for it.. but will treat you as an abnormality instead.. a lamb that has lost its way and should be guided back to her flock, or forced to do so against her will if necessary. In a society like ours, you learn that a woman and a smart brain do not meet.. that it is OK for women to be dependent, because that's what men are made for. Only a man is allowed and encouraged to be independent, while a woman is brought up to be weak and vulnerable. Shall any girl show any sign of being smart or having ambition, she must be knocked down, for fear that she might disturb the balance of the universe! Hence, a smart man impresses you, while a smart woman freaks you out. A strong man wins your admiration and respect, while a strong woman makes you reach for your gun. That's what an artificially-fabricated social order does to us. We invent molds, we shape our young to fit into those molds, pushing and squeezing them throughout their lives to enter their boxes of what we decided to be "masculine" or "feminine," feeding them all about the "division of roles" and other myths of our invention.

By now, you should have figured out what I meant by saying that I am more in harmony with who I naturally am than the majority who consider themselves to be the norm. We are all born equal, but outside forces stand against our natural evolution, preferring to turn us into puppets, playing roles according to a pre-written scenario.. even if it is against our humanity, and even if it defies mere logic. Yet, what's worse than all that is the brainwash process that we are subjected to throughout our lives.. the brainwash that leads generation after generation to accept such ideas and in turn implant them into their offspring. Thus, the vicious cycle continues to produce people who basically spend their lifetime fighting against their nature. And unfortunately, there is a huge machinery backing-up this false system.. it's everywhere (TV, magazines, commericals, schools, universities, laws, etc.) .. and patriarchs have always been careful to keep all its keys under their control.

Societies, in any time or place, would have never moved a single step forward if it were not for the few who refuse to give in to such mutilation. All of us were born feminists.. yes, all of us.. boys and girls.. we were all born equal and we wanted to remain as such. Feminists are believers in equality and justice. And if anyone considers that to be wrong, or strange, or bad, then s/he would better look and see where they stand. As for me, I shall forever remain happy and proud to be guilty of feminism.

It's Time to Say: "Back Off!"

Hi again.. I'm saying 'HI' as I have recently come back from vacation. My absence was due to many reasons, none of which can be discussed here. Yet, from now on I can promise everyone that they would find a huge change with this blog. Let's make it a surprise..

Today I talk about sexual harassment.. Wait.. I know what you're thinking now. Please be patient.. No, it's not a "going-with- the-flow" kind of business. And no, it's not because I suddenly discovered (like many people pretend to do) that women are being harassed in Egypt! And no, I won't waste your precious time on the usual talk which is being reproduced here and there. Nonetheless, I can't hide how happy I am that Egyptians have (at last!) decided to speak up and publicly condemn this shameful practice, which had in fact turned into a massive plague during the past few years.

I'm glad that nowadays we openly admit that women are not safe in Egypt. And I salute the idea of the campaign launched by the Ministry of Tourism. One of their TV ads show a truck driver harassing a female tourist, who angrily complains that "this has never happened to her anywhere else." The ad ends by telling the harasser, "You're not the only one to lose. We all lose." They might have as well added the label "ONLY IN EGYPT", although I don't believe it's true. Still, we should admit that sexual harassment is not as widely practiced anywhere else as it is in Egypt. In fact, it has become part of an Egyptian female's daily routine! You wake up, get dressed, head to school or university or work, get harassed on the way, and then get harassed again on your way back home.

I really wish to see an ad asking men to stop harassing Egyptian women. Don't get me wrong. I encourage protecting tourists with all my heart. Their safety is the least we can guarantee them while they're visiting our land. But don't you think that we lose more by turning a blind eye and a deaf ear to the daily suffering of our own women! Money is not the only thing to lose. And allow me to say that it is the last thing we should care about losing if we lose everything that makes us human.. I'm talking about honor and dignity.

This BCC report, titled "Egypt voices: Sexual harassment", is not only worth reading, but it is also worth writing about. In this report, several Egyptian girls talk about their personal experiences with sexual harassment. Up till here, there's nothing new. What's new is that those girls did so while showing their faces, stating their true names and professions! Now, many will consider this an act of outstanding courage. But I wanna tell you that one becomes that brave (or daring if you might say) when one loses hope. In other words, when you are fed up, and you realize that you're all alone and that things will never get better unless you scream out loud in the desperate hope that someone may overhear you. This does not decrease our respect for their courage, for it takes a very strong person to face a society like ours with such facts. There is no more "I heard that". There is no more "one of my friends got harassed". There is finally a confession in first person pronoun.. "I was harassed". And it didn't stop there, for they moved to describing real incidents.. what the harassers did to them and how they felt during and after this ordeal.

I don't remember how many times I have been verbally harassed. According to the latest survey, 4 out of every 5 females in Egypt get harassed on daily basis! This doesn't mean that the other 1 out of 5 were never subject to sexual harassment.. It simply means that they don't experience it on daily basis. And I believe that this is the first true figure to be announced about sexual harassment in Egypt.. or 'the cancer', as the The Egyptian Center for Women Rights calls it in its latest survey. However, I don't like this metaphor, as it makes harassment sound like it has no cure, while on the contrary, this disease can and must be cured. Its cure lies in the hands of many who have for long chosen to be passive and to simply live in denial. Finally, I'm glad to announce that we're waiting for a law that would punish sexual harassers. However, I don't trust how laws function in our dear third world countries. My own problem, I know.. but it may as well be yours if this law (in case it sees the light) didn't improve anything.

In my previous post I wrote about the ridiculous lollipop ad and warned that it will only serve to provide more support to harassers. I also said that females in this country have got the choice between allowing themselves to be reduced into inanimate objects, or fighting for their humanity and their basic civil rights in a safe street and safe means of transportation. I think it's time to be more specific about what is expected of a girl who values her humanity.

One of the girls interviewed in the report mentioned above said that her mother told her not to answer back to those who harass her. How many times have we heard this, huh? With all respect to our mothers who lived in a different Egypt and who safely wore mini skirts to university without ever meeting an indecent look or gesture.. this dusty advice can go straight to hell. Being raised in shame, swallowing all kinds of insult and abuse in silence so as not to disturb our patriarchal society in its sleep has caused us to reach this dead end we're facing today. Now, what should we wait for? For society to protect us?? Hahaha. Bogus!

I say we keep screaming. It's healthy. Better than increasing the repression and hiding the agony. It is time for this society to wake up and see what it has done to its women.. don't you think so? But meanwhile, you should also seek to defend yourself. Unless you care to stand up for yourself, nobody will care for you. You won't earn anyone's respect if you just keep enduring being slapped. You will turn from being the victim into being guilty. You will be the cross onto which society shall hang all its failures and rottenness. If you have respect for yourself.. and if you think that you deserve to be treated with respect.. raise your head up high and shake off all the shame and guilt that they laid on you. Defend your right and take back your street. Yes, it is yours! It's not Men's Street. It is your street as well. You are not an excess. You are not a lollipop or any goody they want to reduce you into. Put the shame on the one who deserves it. Make the insect who dares touch you or talk to you in an improper way see your disgust, and expose him in front of everyone.


Here are some final tips which are personally tested and proven to reduce harassment. Preventing it, though, would need a collaborative effort. Remember that by being passive you are not only harming yourself, but you are putting hundreds at risk. Think about it.

1. Have a serious look on your face whenever you're walking down the street. This would give any harasser an indication that you're not the quiet, shy kind of girl. He would be reluctant to approach you for fear that his assault might provoke you enough to scream and scandalize him.

2. When you ride a bus or metro, or if you are in a crowded place, don't look around you as if you are expecting to be harassed at any moment. Harassers smell weak girls who are already scared. They know that fear will paralyze you for a few seconds, and that is all they need. Instead, stand up straight. Act confident. Look people in the eye. And if you meet the eye of someone you suspect of being a harasser, don't ever look away. Give him a slight grim mixed with the "Don't-even-think-about-it" kind of look directly in the eye.

3. If you have to walk down a quiet inner alley, don't walk close to the buildings. This will encourage any harasser, because he knows that chances of you being noticed by passers by or inhabitants who might be present in their balconies is minimal. Instead, walk towards the middle of the street. You might think that hiding makes you safe, but in fact you are trapping yourself, being blocked from view. It is also recommended, in case you pass by this alley on daily basis, to save the number of the nearest police station on your mobile.. preferably saving it as "1police", for example. This will make it on top of your phone book list for a fast dial.

4. If you think you're being harassed, do not deceive yourself into mistaking it for a joke. Many girls endure inappropriate comments or gestures made by their colleagues, bosses, teachers…etc, trying to convince themselves that it is just their way of joking, or that those persons have a crude sense of humor! They think that rejecting these acts or being firm would cause embarrassment and unneeded tension! Baby, if you feel bad, awkward, offended, uneasy, or that something is wrong, then it has to be as such. Sugar-coating harassment won't make it sound any better. If you don't stop this early enough, the person who is harassing you (whoever he is.. and yes, he can be as old as your grandfather) will take it as a green light to proceed to more daring stuff. Don't be a willing victim. Denial always makes things worse.

5. If you get harassed, make a scene. This does not only teach your harasser a lesson, but it also makes you stronger as you discover how cowardly those harassers turn to be. You will be more able to defend yourself. Once you lose the fear.. fear of the harasser and fear of speaking out.. you will be amazed as you encounter less and less harassments. By then, you'd think that those insects that roam the streets have suddenly disappeared. But no.. The harassers didn't disappear.. it is the new you that they fear.

The Egyptian Working Woman

A few weeks ago after a long busy day, I decided to sit down and watch a little TV. I was flipping through the channels when I came across an episode of "elbeyout asrar". I started watching in the middle of the episode, and figured out that the subject was women's work. There were two groups of people on the show... The invited guests, which were men and women in their late 40's and 50's, and the audience, which were mainly younger people... Some were college students and others looked like they were in their early 20's. I do not recall the exact words of every person on the show,however, The older people were all pro work. the women all talked about their experiences in life, how their careers helped them, and how their husbands supported them. They talked about their children. More than once they were asked if their careers compromised the care for their children, and they all answered that the children were not compromised. Until here, it all sounds fine and dandy..... you would think that since the older generations think this way, the younger generations will definitely be more open minded, and women will be more career oriented....

Sadly things were not at all this way. The moment the young audience members were given the chance to express their opinions is the moment that things began to go downhill..... A young man, possibly in his early 20's stated that he will not allow his wife to work.. no matter what. He believed a woman's place is her home and nothing more. Another young man said I will give my wife a chance to work and see if she can work, take care of the children alone, and take care of the house alone...( and get this)..... and take care of ME!!!! ( is he 2 or something?? does she need to change his diapers as well??) then he will "ALLOW" her to work, however if she defaults in any way, or if he feels that she is not up to par.... then he will "FORBID" her getting a job or having a career!!!! ( Ya LAHWY!!) Much to my dismay and utter disappointment his sentiments were echoed by several male audience members.. The Female audience members let me down even more.... ALL and I repeat... ALL the women in the audience ( whom I will add that judging from their appearance were in their early 20's) Stated that their "DREAM" was to get married and sit at home.... no one.. I repeat... NO ONE mentioned the desire for a career.... success was nothing they referred to or thought of in any way. They were all college graduates who "chose" to throw away their degree forever!! A couple mentioned they would like to work until they meet the right man.... so for them work was a way of "catching" a husband! When these girls were asked about their ambition, their comment was very similar to the young men... they all agreed that women have no ambition, that a woman's ambition should be to cook and clean and care for children... They agreed that a woman's career ambition is a "myth" that the western media tries to brainwash women into believing!!!

I cannot even begin to express my utter dismay at this picture, or my disappointment at the young women and men of Egypt... At a time when our country is falling deeper and deeper In debt, our educational system is corrupt, various groups are fighting over control of our government... poverty is rampant... health care is sub par to say the least, and inflation is tearing homes apart.... gas prices are rising, bread is scarce... our industries are practically non existent... there is absolutely no form of organized scientific research... no publications, and no funding or resources... at a time when all our young talents are leaving the country to look for a better life abroad.. thus costing us billions... unemployment rates are so high that the norm for young graduates is not being employed At time where our borders are being breached, fundamentalism is gaining new grounds every day, and our country needs a complete overhaul... These women are only thinking about sitting at home... and the men are thinking about how to keep them at home!!

The way I look at things is that our country needs every ounce of work and energy available to help us rise out of this economic and social depression. The concept of a woman working should be a no brainer... The subject has been discussed over and over for more than 120 years... and women have been working since our grandparents came of age in the 40's and the 50's. It is unusual for a society to fall back so much, and for women to lose so much in such a short time. What Egyptian women have worked so hard for is slowly being yanked out from under their feet... and they are totally oblivious. The amount of brainwashing that has happened in our culture over the past 20 years is astounding!! The mystery to me is how do you oppress people while at the same time convincing them that oppression was their idea in the first place... so they think that their oppression is liberation??? I know it sounds confusing but we are living examples of this twisted logic.


I am not against a woman deciding to be a "stay at home mom" . The concept itself is a noble one that involves hard work, selflessness and endless dedication to the growing children. But if all women suddenly decide to stay at home... It is no longer a selfless act... it is actually turned into a very selfish act... Let me explain why:

1- For starters... Children only need their mothers in the first few years of life..... After the age of 4, all kids go to school, so really a mother sitting at home isn't doing much for the child... the child is not getting any more attention, care or love than a child who has a working mother. So sitting at home at this point is selfish... The person is just being lazy and not contributing to society.

For working mothers in Egypt, The Egyptian government has done a lot. A very generous law that does not exist everywhere is the "child care leave". A working woman in Egypt by law can take up to 5 YEARS!!! off of work., and can go back to her job immediately in the same position she was in before she took her leave... so mothers have the option of keeping their jobs while caring for their families at the same time... so if you have 2 kids or less..... you have enough vacations and leaves to cover time off to care for your children... So why do Egyptian mothers want to leave the work force? Unfortunately I cannot answer this question, since everyone who leaves says the excuse is to "care for the family".. Which is a redundant argument....


2- Men argue that they need a wife to "take care" of them...

Unless the man is incapacitated or handicapped in some way, No adult responsible working man needs a woman to take care of him. Men can feed themselves, dress themselves and clean themselves after bowel movements just as well as women... so no, they do not need to be cared for. Men are taught from a young age that they should not lift a finger to care for their house... they should not clean, they should not cook..... all of this " dirty work" is beneath them.... leave it all to the woman... women should do these jobs... to men these jobs are insults.
My question is... why not share house work? share caring for the kids? this way spouses have more time together... women are happier and more rested, so can dedicate more quality time to their significant others and children.. And how exactly does this interfere with a woman's ability to have a career? The young man on TV who mentioned that he will "test" his future wife's ability to multitask without lifting a finger to help her really infuriated me... Is this how we are raising Egyptian men? to be selfish self-centered conceited judgemental spoiled brats? and at the same time we are teaching the young women that they are not worthy enough to complain?? Just be quiet and quit work and do what the almighty man dictates!!!he is superior so his opinion shall prevail no matter what?? Excuse me while I go barf at the mere thought !!
I would have been happier if the young man had said, I will see what my wife can do, and help out with the rest so we can both have careers, and we can both be happy!!! Why are they all oblivious to this concept??

3- Men argue that if a man can afford to care for the house financially, a woman doesn't HAVE to work....

This is actually one of the most annoying arguments. Women in Egypt cost the government thousands of pounds to get a college education.... so if a woman chooses not to work, she should pay back this money so another person can use it to be educated and benefit society. Sitting at home after costing hundreds of thousands of pounds to get an education is a waste of public resources that should not be allowed.... It is no wonder we are in debt... money is being thrown left and right to give "free" college education to people who do not need it and will not use it.


If this money is used by the ministry of education to fund research in labs wouldn't it be better spent? wouldn't it help Egyptians more than if the money is thrown away by women who would like to sit at home?? One of the major reasons of lack of scientific research in Egypt is the lack of Equipment and supplies that are needed to run the labs.... intelligent people who know science or medicine are not enough for conducting research..... equipment that no one can afford... which costs millions is needed before any research can be carried out. .. so this is my argument..... if you don't want to use it, then don't take it!!!

I believe in free college education only to those who will use it to benefit society... so no... there is no such thing as someone who doesn't "have" to work.


4- People argue that women are crowding men and pushing them out of work... They make this claim saying that women don't need the jobs and are doing it for "fun" so it is best that they just sit at home and clean and cook.....

To this claim, I would like to respond that not all women have someone who supports them. Some women are widows with children... some are single, some are married, but with the current level of income in Egypt, one salary is never enough!!! sometimes 2 salaries are not enough either, and one of the spouses ends up getting a second job. To men who feel that women are overcrowding them I say, please don't be short sighted.... do not underestimate the value of the woman who works in the neighboring office.... she may be doing more for her family than any man could. Women in the work place need to be acknowledged, respected and appreciated. They do not "overcrowd" and their value in the workplace is not any less than their male colleagues. I came across this very interesting documentary on youtube. If women are suddenly not allowed to work, or their presence is not tolerated in the workplace, what would the women in this video do??

5- People argue that there aren't enough jobs for everybody... so women need to sit at home, and let the men work, so every family will have at least one income!!


To this claim I would like to say that even though there aren't enough sources of income for work for everyone, however, there is so much work that needs to be done that no one is doing. The one concept that we rarely ever hear of in Egypt is volunteering.

I believe it is the duty of every capable Egyptian person whether male or female to volunteer in some way to help society. Public hospitals are a mess. Patients need assistance left and right. In most countries high school and college students volunteer in the summer to help in hospitals. they wheel patients to their rooms. They sit at information desks and give directions. They assist with placement of patients in rooms in the public clinics.... they even help clean the place. This practice is much needed in Egypt, it will give idle young people something to do,they will get experience and they will help others.

In rural areas illiteracy is rampant. We need volunteers to educate these people.
Our streets need cleaning. We need volunteers to help with that too.
We need money for education, health care, food for the poor...etc. we need volunteers to help.
We have millions of homeless children... we need volunteers to feed them and teach them and get them off of the streets.
We don't have enough blood in our blood banks, we need volunteers to help with the blood drives.
We have special needs children in schools, we need people to help with those children.
We have old people who are alone, or can't cook or are incapacitated, we need volunteers to help them.
We have public schools where there aren't enough teachers, and classes are overcrowded.. we need volunteers there too.

The examples are endless... I can go on forever. So to say there isn't enough to do is an understatement. There is plenty to do, but we choose not to do them. If people are complaining of unemployment, and can afford to live without a job at least temporarily, they should go volunteer. Women who are married to men that can afford to take care of the house financially should go volunteer. High schoolers and college students in their summer breaks should go volunteer. Being idle at home should not be an option. Progress is not easy and it comes with a price. If we don't pay this price, then who will?? Our strength as Egyptians comes in our numbers and in our intelligence. We need to not waste them, since they are our most precious assets. Women who sit at home waste valuable manpower, that we all need to move forward.

SO to say that women should stay at home is selfish, and is something that is said by people who only think of themselves. Our country needs us, we are the driving force behind the progress of our nation. We all need to work together,. Whining about corruption or where money went will not help us. Working together will. I am not saying that corruption is not a factor, but I am saying Corruption has become the excuse for everything wrong with our lives a " mosmar go7a" if you will, that we hang all of our problems on. There is so much more we can do to make Egypt better.... we just need to try!

Retards Make It to The Atlantic

The money quote:
"You won't be able to stop them (i.e. guys), but you can protect yourself. He who created you knows what's best for you!"

Hello all the lollipops out there.. and the flies too. Hope everybody's is doing great in Candyland!

Well, I've -unfortunately- seen this stupid ad in many places around the internet. I even received it in an email! (Some of my buddies have gone into the habit of spamming lately.) When I first laid eyes on it, the only thing that came to mind was.. WTF? I felt disgusted and offended beyond belief. And every time I saw it on a blog or a Facebook group the same lump found its way to my throat.

Until, one day, I saw it on The Atlantic! Even Andrew Sullivan seems to have been moved by it. Yeah.. Voila.. It's right there in my face.. But this time there was something new about it. I thought I saw a tongue sticking out from behind the lollipops! Most probably it was the working of my insulted brain which in turn intoxicated my imagination. I rubbed my eyes, looked back again.. still nothing changed.. There is the stupid ad, the lollipops, the flies and the tongue!

Sandmonkey has said enough about this, that I need say no more. Although in his post he has reached an awkward conclusion assuming that hijabi females themselves are the ones responsible for this stupid campaign! (Why?.. No clue.) Wish such a disgusting ad would have stayed at home.. but uhuh.. that's just one of the disadvantages of Globalization.. Things cannot be kept at home for too long! Now, the whole world can see the latest inventions of the Egyptian mind! That's how Egyptians use the evil West's modern technology.. precisely, as manifest in Photoshop! See? Who on earth could have thought of this but us? It still is creative, if you can somehow bring yourself to take out the "sick" aspect of it.

Let's cast all that aside now, and please bear to look at this thing (sorry) from a fresh angle.. an Egyptian one as well.

I don't believe hijab propagandists have grown that desperate while seeking to influence more girls to wear hijab, knowing that almost 80% of Egyptian females today are hijab-wearers. What's freaking me out about this ad, though, is its indirect encouragement to sexual harassers!

Seeing this ad from a boy's eyes, the message is totally reversed from a presumably "religious", "pious", or "moral" cause, to an implication that sexual harassment is the norm, and that whoever dislikes it should make this clear by dropping down a veil over her head.. so as to say, become marked. You guys are thus being encouraged to direct your sexual advancements towards those who do not hold this mark.. the X.

Mind you.. How come we see no ads, stickers, flyers, posters or the like, telling guys to back off? or reminding them of the punishment of a sexual harasser in the afterlife? The doors of hell seem to be wide open exclusively to females!.. and in today's Egypt those females are defined as those who do not cover their hair! On the other hand, though, nothing whatsoever is said about male sexual harassers. Sometimes I even imagine that they are ready to place a reward for those who harass females down the streets or means of public transportation! And the message that is being transmitted all the time sounds like "Girls are asking for it. Girls deserve it. Girls are the source of evil. Girls are temptation. Girls are the ones who push you to sin, and if you give in to their temptation you are just a poor fellow, and it is totally human, and God will forgive you for being weak. But she.. she will burn in eternal hell."

I can't believe I'm about to do this.. But let me play a devil's advocate for a while.

Suppose that girls are asking to be harassed.. Supposed that they enjoy your sneaky hand exploring their bodies.. Suppose they are just pretending to be offended while in secret that is what they are seeking after.. And suppose that you are merely answering their call. Why don't you count your sister among them? Why don't you count your wife among them? Why don't you count your daughter among them? Are they immune? Or.. the question I'd better ask is.. Are they marked as untouchables?

Here it is. In a man's world you can not place any restrictions on men. You can not ask them to be moral, religious, God-fearing.. or even human. Most of them will be delighted by the thought of being considered as insects, as long as they are allowed to roam freely and indulge in every low desire. "So what? Call me an insect.. Fine by me. But let those lollipops be prepared for my adventures. Let them know that they can never hope to get rid of my jaws and my stinky tongue. Let them surrender to my rules."

Islamist Fundamentalists exploit this patriarchal rot seeking their own advantages. They are other insects of another kind, feeding on social fungus. For them, reforming manners and calling people to abide by high morals means their distinction. What will they feed on when there is no more rot? While the status-quo is so full of advantages.. that's their ultimate playground. That's why they can exercise their influence at full length. Patriarchs will appreciate this license to sin, while in return they will offer huge support to those fundamentalists.. after all, they are the ones in power.. they control society.. and those fellow insects will help them to gain more control.

Girls in this position have no choice. They are not doers, and they are brought up to believe that they can never aspire to be doers. They are the done-by. You either accept the marking system (the veil) or you are exposed to waves of criticism and rebuke for being the primary source of evil on earth. You can not break this affiliation between patriarchy and islamic fundamentalism.. it is a match made in heaven!.. and you are too weak to dare question their values.

But wait a minute.. Your submission is not solving anything.. not even for you. On the contrary.. it is making things much worse. By accepting to play the role of the lollipop, you are in fact declaring the death of humanity. You are the one building Candyland with your own hands. And you're building it for insects to enjoy! In Candyland, there are only lollipops and flies.. Flies are the living organisms, they rule.. lollipops are merely inanimate objects. Wrapped or unwrapped, they still are the same. Insects will consume you one way or another.

Believe it or not.. you can stop all this! You have the power within you to decide and choose, because you are still a human being. So, you can either choose to stay as such and change your society to better, inspiring them to stick on to their humanity, and refusing to be exploited in such a way.. or.. you can go ahead and surrender.. go with the flow.. be the lollipop and lose any hope in becoming a human being once more. It all lies within your hands.

D for Dream

Been a while since my last post.. You might think I've started to get lazy or that my enthusiasm is fading. Wait until you hear my side of the story..

I didn't follow a tradition that I saw lots of bloggers following.. and that is celebrating their blogging anniversary, or as you might say the "birthday" of their blogs! It's not that I missed the date or that I didn't think of anything to write.. As a matter of fact, it was quite the contrary. First of all, I can never forget the day I started this blog.. a day which opened a door to a wonderful experience, that looking back now I can't imagine how life was before. Secondly, I shall be forever grateful for the blessings that this blog bestowed on me.. If only for the friends I made, I can write a book.. a big fat happy one.

So, why has my production decreased and why have I been slower?

Well, you might think it's funny, or that I'm joking.. But the truth is.. my production has actually increased, and super fast! Today, I write on several blogs, several groups on the booming Facebook, and I'm the editor-in-chief of a very promising online mag! I've reached out to thousands of people, not only in Egypt, but in different places around the world. I somehow got used to reading about my blogs and groups in Egyptian and Arab newspapers and magazines, or hearing about them on TV. (Had only one TV appearance because I am keen on privacy.)

All of this in only one year! And what a year! I've grown a lot in this year, I gotta say. I've stretched myself to the max and kept branching wherever I could. Mind you, I have a life.. and a very busy one!.. I'm not an online geek. Yet, being a person driven by passion and a strong belief in the message I'm seeking to communicate to the world, it just happened naturally, without any plans.

Aiming high, there was always a force pushing me forward and urging me to do my best. Throughout my life, I've never stopped to celebrate my achievements.. and maybe that's why I didn't celebrate my first year of blogging. What's more important, though, is knowing that there has been an accomplishment and being willing to increase it.

Still, I had to pause and catch some breath. I had to look and see where I'd be heading next. It's good to be driven for a while, but you shall never allow yourself to lose track. Being dedicated to cause is a human blessing, and being able to serve this cause in an efficient way is a double bless. And that's precisely what I'm after.. efficiency.

Back when I was young, success for me was merely "overcoming a challenge," given the many obstacles on the way to it. I believe most girls get tricked the same way, and that might be the reason why they don't continue towards making solid achievements.. Their experiences are usually cut off when they think they've reached the end of the road, like when you pass the last and biggest challenge in a computer game. And that's it for them.. screen says YOU WON!.. so that's where the game ends, right? Society consumes us into this empty game of overcoming challenges towards small milestones that are not by any means an aim in themselves.. Yet, girls are being deceived into mistaking them for a end.

Take education for instance.. A college degree for most of the Egyptian girls is an end in itself. You'd scarcely meet a girl who has planned her career, even if she's about to receive her degree. Some of them do not even make up their minds whether they'll pursue a career or not! "Let me finish the challenge at hand.. that's my success", a typical girl would think.

It is indeed a big challenge to think outside this box into which society has confined us. That's why our girls are not demanding in any way (except when it comes to material demands, huh?). They're kept in their little world, their computer game, their Barbie house.. and likewise, their dreams are tiny, earthly and shortsighted. I wonder if the word "dream" is even appropriate to use in this miserable context. Dreaming women contribute to shaping our world, while those girls never make it past their itsy-bitsy doll houses. And, I must say, they were brought up to think that this is how far they can go, and be safe!

Women who make big achievements are usually categorized as bitches. You can either be a weak woman, or a successful bitch!.. And if you've got a brain, you've got to be a bitch. That's the patriarchal culture we live in. You think and act, then you've trespassed your feminine limitations into the masculine territory. Now, you have to be ready to pay the price. It's not only that in your case the road to success was the hardest of all.. wait until you get there and you'll be damned for it.

Thus, motivation and strong will are other big challenges in a woman's world. Many women think that whatever they can achieve is not worth being stoned for it. Therefore, they follow the safety instructions listed in their old grannies' manuals, which they learned to trust and treasure so dearly. Wisdom is always good, you know. What they don't know, however, is that wisdom never built anything or invented anything. If we allow ourselves to get stuck in this old wisdom safe box, we can never move a single step ahead. Stepping ahead has got its risks.. and you can never be able to take those risks unless you are a dreamer. If you dream, you dare take risks. Only then will you discover, and grow, and make a change.

So, what has this got to do with what I was talking about in the beginning of this post? Alright.. I've been reflecting on the difference between thinking, writing down your thoughts, and publishing those thoughts. Many people think to themselves and then lock up their thoughts inside their heads.. or maybe exchange bits and pieces of their views during friendly chats. Other people have got what it takes to give these thoughts a written form and deliver a coherent piece of their minds. They may keep a journal for themselves, or share it with friends and dear ones. Yet, publishing one's thoughts is a totally other thing.

This blog started with a dream dwelling inside my mind.. and when I dared raise up my voice and reach out to the world, this dream finally made sense. Not only so, it developed in so many ways that I've never thought of.

My partnership with Egyptian Feminist Chic has allowed this dream to evolve, and acted as a live manifestation of how dreams meet and create a new hope. No one can imagine how much we both have in common.. and I wouldn't have found that out if I hadn't taken the decision of going public. She, on the other hand, could have easily been one of those who drift over this blog and say to herself "nice" and move on. But because she is a dreamer, she didn't. She actually took the time to express herself and share ideas and discussions. She had her say. And before she knew it, she turned into a blogger. (I must ask her how this felt like.)

This brings us to the big dream.. a Modern Egyptian Feminist Movement that would inspire women to fight for their rights. All of you are invited to contribute to this one. I've grown so tired of thinking alone, and I stopped this habit a year ago. Let's all cast our cards and think together.. How can such a movement be possible? Does it have to follow the footsteps of the movement we once had in the beginning of the previous century? Does it have to be led by someone from the political arena? How can we pave the way for such a dream to take shape and become real? What's our role as intellectual women and men in bringing about such a movement? OR.. Is there an alternative method through which we can achieve the same aims?

OR.. Am I merely being insane?

Childless by choice ... dream or nightmare?

From the day a girl learns to play, she is given dolls. Most girls will pretend the dolls are their "babies". They will pretend to feed them, and care for them. They lull them to sleep and kiss them good night.. They will pretend to be mothers. Most girls will love interacting with new babies, holding them, helping grown ups take care of them... by looking at these girls, one would think that motherhood comes naturally to females in general. The concept is taken and generalized... and becomes the norm, and the expectation of every adult woman. Any woman who dares think differently is not tolerated. As girls get older they are taught that motherhood is the most important role a woman could have. They go to school and get an education, but they are taught that children and motherhood come first, career comes second, if at all. Many are told that a career in something to fall back on just in case you never get married, or your husband for some reason is incapacitated and cannot work, so you can be the "backup" breadwinner until he recovers. Many girls spend all of their premarital life looking forward to the day when they will be mothers.... others will marry only to have children, the husband has a secondary role in their equation. To top it all off, religion dictates that a woman's "role" is child bearing and caring for the family.... This may seem like a traditional way of thinking... a no brainer.. really isn't this what all women want??

The answer to this question is yes, and no. Yes, because most, but not all women want to have children. There are no real statistics to verify this statement, but if you look at countries where having a child is not a necessity, it is not uncommon to see a woman who has decided not have kids. They are women who are childless by choice. They would rather go to the movies than spend the weekend feeding and changing diapers. They would rather spend time with their significant other, enjoying each others company, rather than fighting about whose turn it is to put the kids to bed, or fix a big healthy dinner, or change a dirty diaper. They would rather get a good night sleep rather than be up all night with a child with a fever. They would rather spend all their energy advancing their careers, rather than spending it dealing with issues relating to caring for kids. They would rather save their money for retirement and for fancy houses, great vacations and expensive cars rather than saving it for a child's education. Is this right? Is this wrong? No one can judge, it is an individual choice. If this is how these women want to spend their life, it is their prerogative. They make a decision, and go through with it, and whatever consequences there are, they bear them, because this is their choice. The other kind of woman is someone who wants to dedicate her life to her family and children. She enjoys caring for dependant children that are her own. She is happy to sing her baby to sleep. Saving money for a child's future gives her a purpose in life. It doesn't matter if her spouse does not do his share of the house work, or refuses to change the baby. Having this baby and caring for it is the joy of her life and the purpose of her existence. Nothing compares to the feeling of tiny hands around her neck giving her a good night hug and a kiss. When she is with her kids, her career is secondary, and whether it exists or not, is not an issue, as long as she has a happy healthy family. She is not concerned about the future if for example she gets divorced or her spouse dies.For this woman, this is her choice, and whatever consequences come of it, they are hers, because it was her decision to live life in this manner. Other women can combine both options together... this is also their choice, and if it results in lack of sleep or excessive stress, or being drained all the time from too much responsibility, they will be happy because they have both a career and a family. Again a choice they made. In this day and age, do women in our Egyptian society have this choice? Can an Egyptian woman decide not to have kids? Will she be ostracized by society for making this decision? What about women who cannot have children?? How can these women cope in such a society?

For an Egyptian woman, life after marriage changes dramatically. From day one of her marriage, she is asked if she is pregnant. If the answer is no, the question will be repeated on each subsequent visit, every phone call, every chance meeting in the street. Parents will ask, in laws will ask, siblings will ask. Friends, neighbors, distant relations, and even colleagues at work. Everyone who knows that she is recently married will ask if she is pregnant, and if she says no, they will ask so when do you plan to get pregnant? The pressure to reproduce is relentless. Delaying child bearing for a year or two will be frowned upon. She will be pressured to have a baby immediately or else. She is "advised" by concerned family members that if she does not have a child as soon as possible, her husband will run off with the next available woman. She is "threatened" by her in laws that if she does not produce the next heir... preferably a male baby, they will get their son a second wife. Religion will be mentioned in every conversation. Her God-given "role" has to be fulfilled as soon as possible.... she is told it is her duty.. it is why God created her. For many women, there is no way around it.... they will try to get pregnant as quickly as possible to please everyone.... and to fulfill the role society demands. Most of the time, one child is never enough... soon after her first child, the relentless nagging and social pressure will begin again to force her to have more and more children.. how these children will be supported is not their concern.... God will provide for the kids, so there is no need for her to look at her finances to see if she and her spouse can afford to take care of a new child. The only way an Egyptian woman can be childless by choice is if she never marries.... which puts a whole new stigma on her.... she will forever be "spinster" a reject, never a part of society.... never accepted for who she is... and constantly reminded that she is nothing without a man. Most women will avoid this stigma if they can.

The consequences of this peer pressure on women seems trivial when compared to the consequences suffered by women who cannot reproduce. These unfortunate women will have to sustain tremendous amounts of societal pressure, and they will have no way out. Explaining intimate details about her very private medical dilemma as painful as that will be for her, will only bring about looks of pity, and gossip behind her back. Some will even offer to find a new wife for her husband, so the man can have a family, totally oblivious to the feelings of the woman. It is as if she does not exist, and her infertility is a crime that requires she be punished for it. A very good read that discusses the dynamics of the cultural impact of infertility on Egyptian women is "Infertility and Patriarchy: The Cultural Politics of Gender and Family Life in Egypt by Marcia Claire Inhorn".

A close look at infertile couples in Egypt will show that the blame is usually placed on the woman's shoulders. Many men will refuse to be tested and will feel that being tested for infertility is an insult to their "manhood". Then the husband's family will blame the woman even if she is not at fault, and threats of divorce or a second wife will be constantly thrown in the woman's face. Lack of reproductive education in our society, and the stigma associated with educating youngsters about their bodies are contributing factors to the many misconceptions prevalent in Egyptian society. The image that comes to the minds of most Egyptians when sex education is mentioned is pornography. This is why most parents are so adamant about preventing their children from learning, or from being taught a course about sex education in the school curriculum. Parents also have many issues regarding this matter. It is often an awkward subject to discuss with teenage children, so many parents avoid it all together, also not all parents have all the answers, since they themselves never received the proper education. If only parents are informed that sex education is about Reproduction, how it works, and how the human body functions, they would understand why this is an important part of education that needs to be included in school curricula, and that it is in no way shameful or embarrassing, and it will not teach children bad behaviour. It will teach them information that will help them function as adults, and will answer questions that they already have, which will otherwise be answered by peers who don't have the proper information as well... hence all the misinformation circulating in society. In the previously mentioned book, the author interviewed Egyptian men who believed that a man deposits a fetus (rather than sperms) in a woman's body, and these men were shocked that women produced eggs, and actually thought that it was a ridiculous idea, because women are not like chickens!!!! One informant went as far as saying that if a woman does not produce children, then the man is feeding her for nothing!!! Another form of unacceptable women objectification. The point of view of women is not any better. Many feel inadequate, and unable to fulfill the role they spent their entire life preparing for. These women live in constant fear that their life as they know it will end because they have "defaulted" in an unforgivable way. They know in their hearts that they can wake up one morning and find that their husband decided to marry another woman, they may wake up one day to find themselves alone, while the man they spent years with has gone and started another family. He laughs and goes out, and sleeps with another woman. He has a life to live... but not the woman. Her inability to conceive is unacceptable. Many women in this situation will end up with depression, and some even contemplate suicide.... There are no support groups for these women, and the nagging society they live in is unforgiving. Even if this is through no fault of their own. I believe that if being childless by choice were acceptable in society, women who suffer from infertility would be less ostracized and less liable for devastation of their family life. Why not encourage careers for girls? Why do we hammer into their brains from the time they open their eyes that they need to be mothers? Why not give them something besides motherhood to look forward to?? The need for motherhood comes naturally to most people, so why are we reinforcing it at the expense of all other options in life? Why is a successful man without children accepted by society, but a successful woman without children ostracized? Encourage your daughters to be talented in music, art, science.... anything she likes.... let them have a life besides being mothers.... let grown women have the choice to be mothers... Why make it a necessity? why is it an order done under societal pressure? When will we be able to see "career women" who are childless by choice?? Why do people feel the need to dictate other people's lives and choices? Why ostracize someone for their ability or inability to reproduce? Just live, and let live. Let Egyptian women be Free!!!

The Victimization of Egyptian Women and Children

I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Somethings are just beyond belief! And I seriously wish that what Egypt has been witnessing lately is just one long bad dream. Don't know what to do if this nightmare doesn't end. Excuse my sad, or rather depressed, tone.. but I am extremely shocked, and on many levels.

Let's start with the child rights laws, which have been the subjects of many debates in Egypt lately. This led to some amendments and now the articles are being discussed once more, faced by huge resistance led by.. of course you know who.. the Muslim Brotherhood! Unfortunately, now that they have occupied 88 seats in the Egyptian parliament, they can object to such laws.. not only so, but the huge media controls they own, as well as those that surrender to their influence, enables them to disfigure anything they object to, and represent it in the most horrible attire to the masses who have come to consider them as their trusted source of information and ready made judgements.

Why am I writing about child rights? Well, there are a number of laws that mainly target the rights of a female child. Pardon me, I feel stupid when I call them rights.. let's say discontinuing violations against young girls, from FGM to early marriages. But that is not the only reason.


I don't know how to explain it to those of you who are not familiar with the Egyptian society (or Arab societies in general), yet let me try. Women here, in spite of of their utter vulnerability, are expected to bear full responsibility of their children. This responsibility may or may not include the financial one. Yet, even if the financial aspect is included, a woman is not supposed to take credit for it.. as opposed to the man, who is automatically perceived of as the bread earner, the hero who toils to provide for his family.

Take this as an example. A typical Egyptian mother is supposed to get as many children as her husband wants. She doesn't have a say in this. This is a man's decision to make. If he asks for more kids, his wish must be granted, or else.. and this "else" includes horrible options.. needless to say, all of which are totally controlled by the man, for he can decide to divorce his wife or desert her or have a second wife. So, to make a story short, that's why a woman has to keep producing babies into this world until her husband decides that he's had enough.

Then, she becomes responsible for nourishing those kids, upbringing them alone (just like a single mom) looking after their health, taking them to school, helping with their homework (if she is educated|), besides her regular chores of course, and satisfying her husband in every possible way. Which means, that basically this woman never gets a chance to have any time for herself.

Now, what if she is married to a cruel man.. or worse, a psycho.. which is not a rare case? He has the right to beat her and her children as severely as he wishes. No criminal charges can be directed against him, unless one of them dies as a result of this beating. And yes, it is allowed in our legal system. And yes, you guessed it right, because some crazy sadistic men have claimed that this is an authorized tool for disciplining a man's wife and children in Islam! Which is absolutely not true.

This woman, even if she has a job, is never encouraged to leave her husband. Even if you are married to a psycho or a drug addict, society expects you to stay in this marriage for the sake of "the children". Black comedy.. but true.. she is stuck with this psycho and her children have to pay the price, until either this man dies a natural death, or one of them ends up being murdered. Then this man is put to jail and the other members of the family, who are already ruined by then, can continue their lives without neither upsetting the society nor being tortured by the father (being in prison).

At last, in the year 2008, and for the first time, new laws are being endorsed to protect child rights in Egypt. Those laws include:

1- Prohibiting the practice of FGM and considering it a criminal act which deserves to be punished by law. ( Yes, up till now FGM is not considered a criminal act. It is prohibited at public hospitals, and the ministry of health forbids any registered doctors from doing the procedure. But there can be no charges against those who break the rule. 2 girls have recently lost their lives while undergoing FGM, and those who operated on them were not charged with anything.)

Bedour, lost her life while undergoing FGM

2- Considering severe beating of a child by his/her parents to be a violation against child rights, and therefore authorities will have the right to place charges against the parent in case of severe injuries and causing disabilities.

3- Raising the age of marriage for females to 18, and any female under this age can not have a legal marriage certificate. (Early marriages are usually arranged by the parents who wish to get rid of the responsibility of their daughters or force them to marry for money.)

4-Giving a mother the right to register her child on her name in cases of illegal children, where the father refuses to give his name to his own child outside marriage. (Currently, there are 120,000 cases of illegal children in Egyptian courts. By law, even if a DNA test relates a child to his parent, the man can still refuse to give his name to his child, as long as there is no official marriage certificate bonding him with the mother. Moreover, a man cannot be forced to take a DNA test in those cases. If he refuses to take it, then nothing can be done.)

Now, imagine this.. The MB objects to all those laws saying the following:

1- FGM should be left as a matter of choice. If parents wish to preserve the "chastity" of their daughters through this procedure, then it is their way of protecting her and deciding what is good for her! Therefore, they claim, by closing the legal doors, they will still do it (as if this is a matter of fact that we have to live with) even if they resort to unprofessional physicians, nurses or "hala' elseha" or "daya".

2- The Muslim Brotherhood considers corporal punishment ban "imported from west", saying that it is an authorized method of disciplining children according to Islam, and building on the hadith "Order your children to pray at the age of seven, beat them for it at the age of ten, and let males and females take separate beds." (The hadith didn't mean to beat a child until death. Severe beating is prohibited in all cases, while minor rebuking back at that time before any other methods of parenting or discipline were introduced was permitted in the case of reminding a kid to pray.). Then the other hadith, which they present in the worst version I've ever seen is "Play with them (your children) for seven (years), beat them for seven, befriend them for seven, and then let them be." Now, this hadith, if it is a real one (I've never seen it anywhere except on their websites) was never said with the verb "beat" edrabohom, but the versions I saw before either had the verb "discipline" adebohom or "educate" 3alemohom in its place. It does not make sense at all when you relate it to what we know about how prophet Muhammed brought up his children, besides the crazy and brutal message behind it. Seriously, those people are cursing their religion!

3- Again, as always, they like the idea of kids getting married. Don't know what those sick people are thinking! And they keep making pathetic excuses for it. How can a girl under 18 be responsible for a family, for God's sake? What are they benefiting by causing more men to rape kids in the name of a legal marriage? Yes, this is rape. Straight and inhuman rape, no matter what the papers say. How come a kid who can not even have a bank account or a driving license be able to get married??!! If I can't be responsible for some money bills or a car made of metal, how come I am allowed to be responsible for a family and raise children while I am legally a child? Who on earth would want a girl under this age to get married? and for what purpose? This is way too much!

4- Yeah, the usual talk. Leave the illegal children in the streets. We have one million homeless children in the streets?.. so what? Let them double or triple.. not a problem. But a child can never have the name of his/her mother. A child whose father is an animal must pay for it for a lifetime. But the animal has to be protected, because he's a man. Now that's a heavenly privilege that no one can touch. He is the god on earth. He chooses whether to give his children a life or execute them. A child whose father is unwilling to give him a name, can never have a life. The god on earth has decided his fate.. so leave the kid to meet it.

Yeah.. yeah. Great macho men! So, this is religion, huh? We are supposed to buy this, aren't we? So, Islam for you is a religion that rewards sadists, psychos and brutal men, while it punishes women and children, the scum of earth, right? Now, let me see this clearly. According to you, we are worshiping a sick man in the sky.. for this being you are claiming to talk on behalf of can never be a deity of any kind.. he can not raise to the level of the human even! What a bunch of psychos you are! I bet that the devil himself has got more ethics than you do.

Take a look at what the MB makes of this here.

Girls Need Modems

Yup! They defintely do. I've recently stumbled upon this amazing research paper by Krista Scott while surfing the net, and I immediately realized that she had clearly spoken my mind.. in a detailed, in-depth and highly organized manner.

In her masters thesis, Scott explains the advantages of female self-publication on the Web.

"The self-publication potential of the Net is one of the main reasons which creators cite as advantageous, since it allows for rhetoric and content which is unmediated by publishers, editors, or the like. Self-publication lends itself to a perception of immediacy, in that readers/users are more likely to feel that they can interact with ezine creators to those whose thoughts apparently are laid bare on the screen."

Hence the title "Girls Need Modems".. Before the internet, female voices were too feeble.. scarcely heard. And society kept pilling up restrictions on female writings in such a way which made publishing an almost impossible dream for women. They found many hands volunteering to shut them up, while they hardly ever found a helping hand that was willing to encourage them to express themselves, unleash their talents or exhibit their intellectual power.

In the beginning, cyberspace was not really promising. It was totally controlled by men.. Staying up all night programming, designing, entering codes, and publishing their own content. Yet, by time things have amazingly changed.. And in some cases even it may seem that tables have turned. Women stepped in so powerfully and made the best they could out of this new tool.

Female activity on cyberspace has exceeded the phase of being merely an outlet for expression and creativity.. Nowadays, one can actually say that the internet has given lots of girls a place to become actively involved with social and political issues.. Things that they would rarely, if ever, have had the chance to participate in! Moreover, the existence of multiple accessible self-publishing tools like blogs, forums, instant messaging.. etc, has allowed women who would not normally speak up on touchy issues to really dig in and find out what they believe and what they want to fight for. It is a haven for free thought, a place to meet like-minded people, get involved with activities and organizations, and write about how we feel as women in the world today.

But how many girls are lucky enough to enjoy that "luxury" in Egypt? That is the sad face that we gotta confront now. The number of Egyptian girls who publish online has got to increase. They need encouragement and support. They need a wave of gurus to teach them how to break out of their silence and realize that it is time for them to speak up.

Women issues has got to be addressed by women.. that's a fact. And girls who enjoy the freedom of owning their own voices online have got a major role to play in the battle for retreiving their freedom in the real world. With freedom comes responsibility. And each one of us out there.. each one who has managed to grab a piece of this cyberspace.. has got a responsibility towards the millions of other girls who haven't got the same opportunity. Believe me, there are millions who count on us. And I sincerely hope that we wouldn't let them down.

Female Bloggers Unite! Girls Online Unite! Let's do our best to make a change. We are lucky inividuals who have got a chance to rewrite history. We CAN do it. We are able to expand the horizon for millions of girls out there, if we only BELIEVE. The future of generations to come lies in our own hands.. RIGHT HERE.. RIGHT NOW.

Women....The Forgotten Media Moguls

As We have mentioned before, a lot of what people think is influenced by the media... what they see or hear influences their peception of the world around them, and alters their mentality and how they handle various situations. Media is obviously a very powerful tool, and to control the media is to control how people around you will think and act. If women ever regain their status in society, I am almost certain that the media will play a major role. I often wonder, when will the time come when women will be able to freely influence the media? when will their voices be heard?

The first cinema production in Egypt was a film shot in Alexandria. This was the beginning of the cinema industry, in 1907 and was a revolution of its own.The first Egyptian to act in a movie was Mohamed Karim, who only had minor roles in movies, which were mainly directed by foreigners. The first Egyptian actors to act in full length movies were the Fawzi el Gazayerli Troup.

This troup was famous for the comedic act of " elme3alem ba7ba7, and his wife om a7mad". Played by Fawzi and his daughter, indicating that since the beginning of the Egytian movie industry, it is clear that both women and men were equally represented, and participated freely. Actors and actresses do not have a major role in influencing the public, meaning they do not write the stories, and they do not produce or direct the movies, so in a sense, they are only the "image" but not the idea.

An astounding fact that I have come to learn in that the first feature film in Egypt was in fact directed by a woman.... Aziza Amir produced Egypt's first feature film, "Laila," in 1927. Numerous women directed and produced films in the 1940s through the mid-'60s, during Egypt's golden age of cinema, which ended when then President Abdel Nasser took state control of the cinema industry. Women have yet to regain their power in the industry. Aziza Amir was Born in Domiat in 1901.... so she was only 26 years old when she took that major milestone.

It is quite clear that most of the Egyptian movie pioneers were women. Examples Aziza Amir , Fatma Rushdi, and Assia.Although not all of them had enough personal funds, there were people in the community who respected and admired them, and were ready to fund their ventures into the world of movie making. Another important note is that these people did not care about each others religion, or political points of view, and they all worked together to introduce the movie industry into a country that had never seen it before, only one year after the first movie was ever made in the world. An example of this is Fatma Rushdie, whose work was funded by a Jewish man called Elie Derie.

Women were pioneers at a time when they needed to struggle and persevere to continue the project. When Aziza Amir made her film Laila in 1927, Talaat Harb told her the famous statement: “You have done what no man dared to do”, because he had been unwilling to risk a long movie, and was content with short movies. All of the hard work eventully paid off, so we can safely say that the foundation of the biggest movie industry in the Middle East was placed by women, and the golden age of that industry was accomplished by both men and women working side by side.

This brings me to the main point of this post.... Whatever happened to the Egyptian movie industry? Where have all the women gone and why are actresses getting fewer and fewer roles, why are women rarely, if ever, the main stars in movies? Why have they been sidelined? The main complaint by Egyptian actresses, that I read and see, is that writers don't write roles for women, and producers do not produce movies for women... It is quite obvious that the wahabization of Egypt has affected our movie industry, and is threatening to destroy over 100 years of work. Add to all of that the increasing number of Egyptian actresses who are obviously in great distress, and are sufferring mentally and intelectually from the wahabist push in the ultra extreme conservative oppressive direction, who suddenly quit work, wear hegab, announce o the world that they are quitting the "sin" of acting and wish God will forgive them.... some have even wore a hegab, and then took it off, then put it back on... or even a niqab! It is quite clear that the actresses of today are hesitant, unrealistic, and confused... Which doesn't help with the current image of women in the media, and which makes women less likely to be taken seriously by their male colleagues.

When it comes to directors on the other hand, it is a totally different story. There are only a few female movie directors, but these women had to fight against great odds to get into the field of directing which has been predominantly run by males since Nasser took over the film industry (as opposed to to how easy it was for men to get into the industry when it was run mainly by women... makes you wonder why men would be so insecure as to opose a woman doing the same job?!) A few examples are Hala Khalil, Sandra Nashat, and of course Egypt's most established and controversial female movie director Inas El Degheidy. All 3 women have been quoted at one point of time saying that they had to stand up to family and to the community around them in order to enter the field of movie directing.. as well as the blatant discrimination in the work field against them simply for being women. When speaking about Inas Eldegheidy in particular, it is clear to see that she has drawn the most criticism because of th nature of her movies. Most of her movies have a main theme.. that is the idea of feminism, and the injustices suffered by Egyptian women in particular due to unfair laws (for example "3afwan ayoha alqanoon", and many others). In our current society, many if not most (but definatly not all) men find this kind of woman intimidating. They fear a woman who is loud enough to be heard and influential enough will some how shake the foundation o the wahabi infiltration into the Egyptian household, thus shaking their egos and sense of self worth... so by the extreme criticism of her work, the feel that in part they are not just fighting the movie's idea, but also fighting any woman who dares complain of the chauvanistic culture that exists.

On a lighter note, I have come to learnthat An American Play I had mentioned before "The Vagina Monologues", actually has an Egyptian version!! It is called "KALAM FI SERRI" Directed by Riham Abdlrazik, who also acts in the play. It played last November in The Cairo Opera House as a part of the second female play directors festival in Cairo. The show aso travelled outside of Egypt, and played in Tunisia in December of 2007.

Even though the play showed in Egypt,it was not without repercussions....Of course, all the opressive anti-woman media moguls objected and theMuslim brotherhood interfered. Mohsen Radi, the MB representative in the Democratic party decided to sue and ban the show, since according to his ideas, the words women an sex cannot be placed together in one sentence as it is "insulting" to the communiy. He claimed that they have crossed all the lines, and have discussed things that should not be mentioned, and that this will result in immoral sexual practices in the community!!! The good thing though is that for once people were not intimidated by the MB's and the ministry of culure ( wezaret althaqafa) Criticized the attack of the MB's on the show stating that the MB's were not truthful , and lacked objectivity in their counterproductive argument, and that they are trying to "ye7agebo" the movie industry :)

The one conclusion I have is that we need freedom of speach, and the MB are doing their best to prevent women expressing themselves in the ,media.... starting by suing actresses who decide to take off the hegab, to plays they dont approve of, to accusing women of attacking religion in movies and plays, thus inflaming society against them, to deciding that certain shows should not discuss problems in society that pretain to certain women, as thay have done to Hala Sar7an when she discussed prostitution in Egypt, and as they are doing with Kalam fi Serri.

Overall , the way I see things is that women have revolutionized a country... and not just one country, but an entire region of the world. Since Egyptian media was the only media for a very long time, and it was only over the past 10 years that other Arabic speaking countries have begun to have a media that is beginning to be somewhat influential. I have yet to see a movie in Arabic that gets as much attention, or publicity, or influence as any Egyptian movie. If women at that time were opressed, this revolution would not have happened. The opression of women is the opression of society. It is the loss of great minds and great ideas. It is the loss of advancement in different fields, and the loss of potential benefits to our country. Wahabists know this , so their main attack is always an attack on women and their freedom and their rights. They do this to weaken us, so they can be the dominant power in the region. Their power and influence comes from oil, which we lack.. However, we have something far better than oil. We have manpower, a bigger population that is more educated than any of the wahabi countries. By sidelining half of this population, they are cutting Egypt's main source of strength and progress in half. They are sending us back in time. We all need to stand up for women and stop the blatant attacks on all their efforts and hard work. When we stand up for women we are standing up for society. When we stand up for society we are standing up for a better future and a better Egypt. Lets all unite and fight for a better Egypt. We need our voices to be heard. We want women to be given their rightful place in the media. The one they have worked so hard to get, yet was stolen right before their very eyes in the name of extremism and mysogyny.