Tuesday, May 22

Can't live with them, and YES, you can live without them

As you might have already noticed, my aim here is empower all girls. Step up and believe in yourselves! You don't need no man to baby-sit and entertain. You don't need a guy to interfere with your life as if he knows better. You certainly don't need a pathetic creature who lives in the desperate attempt to try to prove his superiority 24/7. You don't need a man to serve while he, the couch potato, keeps switching TV while complaining about each and everything. You don't need to hinder your advancement in life and throw away your potential so that he can secure all the resources he needs to satisfy his selfish ego.

The female is a complete creature. She is created in perfection to sustain all the basic needs in life, with minimum dependency. She grows mature faster than her male peers, cause evolution knew what's best for humanity. She has got the passion and patience needed for success. She lives longer although she works more. It is true, while there is always a percentage of men who don't work at all, there is not a single woman in the world who doesn't work. Cause they are the dependents. Like pets, they can't feed themselves or clean for themselves or organize their environment. They need us to care for them, and then turn us into slaves!

So, don't allow such a good for nothing creature to control your life. Never allow your precious life to revolve around him. Never stop believing in your abilities and skills. Yes, you are smarter, although they will do everything in the world to make you believe otherwise. Yes, you are more powerful, they control you cause they know that if you had a chance this will end their unjustified superiority. Yes, you are complete, you don't need a man in your life as you can make your own living and look after yourself. You can be anything you wanna be, the sky is the limit. If you only believe..

34 comments:

Miss Egyptiana "Trapped Soul" said...

hello fantasia ..

i am glad you commented on my blog, that gave me a perfect chance to start exploring your world ... a world with equality and justice .. not just empty words ... but true equality and justice ...

i am with u in this, and together we may start to make a difference ... we need to have a loud voice of our own ... to stop being treated as pieces of meat to eat ... and discard when they wanna

i also recommend you read Egyptian fe-mail blog ... by marwa rakha .. it is so so good .. another voice in the empty space we live in

Fantasia said...

Many thanks Egyptiana. You really have a wonderful blog. I enjoyed my visit there. And I am glad that you took time to check out my world.

I can see that you are interested. We definitely need to listen to one another, support one another and be heard.

I also checked Marwa Rakha's blog. She's such an inspiring person, with lots of insights.

I value your encouragement.

The Alien said...

i am with u in everything
female is a complete creature and it is men who say and try to convince her with the opposite
men r not going to change this situation, they do not want to loss the power they have
girls must move and fight, they must raise their voices and say NO

i do have a question:
why u think that this blog is not for guys? and that we will not be pleased with what we read?
i read it all and i am happy with it

keep doing this and i hope i can help
have fun

Bassam said...

Hi,
I agree with Alien that your blog can be for men as well.

We are open minded and we are willing to listen and discuess what you have to say.

please don't be mad at me but I have a few comments I would like to make,

-You are urging women to change, how about starting by getting ride of the pink background that you have. (I hope you understand what I mean by that)

-With all do respect to the feminist movements and all the great success they achieved for women and humanity, many times they lack objectivity, an example of that is the portrayal
of men as inferior to women in order to prove the superiority of women. Even if you do believe that women are superior and men are inferior, it's not exactly the best way to fight for equality.

-Finally, please keep talking louder and louder because we need strong women, if we were to achieve any progress in our Arabian societies

Eyad Harfoush said...

Dear Fantasia,

What you are talking about here is not feminism, it is absolute FANATISM, the degree of anger and hate you voiced, stands as a proof on how male and female are both vital to each other, and how wounds they leave on each other are agonizing. Feminism is something to live for, but fanatism is a negative energy

sokoothansawat said...

Dear fantasy, first of all welcome to the vase and open world of blogging, way to go girl, thanks for stoppin by at my blog as well. but honey i got to say i totally disagree with your post. there is no such thing as a complete creature, it is god's miracle to make every creature in this world incomplete untill they unit with their mate. we as women need men to share with and enjoy, there is no dispute between the two genders, they both share the same agony of daily life. i totally disagree that men are nothing but useless veg who are good for nothing, ask any poor and low class ( technically only) women who lives in poor neighbourhoods and watch how much she is crazy about her husband, ask her if she thinks her husband who works from sunrise to mid night just to provide her with little of the little how she thinks of her man and she will tell you he is support. we should unit to be stronger, amazon is never fun.
waiting to read more from your intellegent ideas..

cesario said...

Man Vs. Woman, let me tell you that no body will win, we're creatures who are supposed to stand together and unite(nothing to do with relationships), unite in life. We need to stop the battle of the sexes and start to see what's wrong with our society, in order that we could improve it.
Women have proven their place(even though there's still room for more, but they'll get there), thanks to our grandmothers who fought so well to ensure the place of women in this country. Now, we just need to take this power and turn it into a positive change.
Women who work are true value to our society, just as our mothers who sacrificed their lives for us. Both women should be celebrated.
As for superiority, well that's not right, no gendre or creature is superior over the other, we have to co-exist and benefit each other through the process(And I have to agree with other bloggers, believing in superiority cancels equality).
I believe that if we truly unite as people, the problems of the world will decrease.
*thanks for stopping by*

عمر said...

Hi there,

I agree that empowering women is a necessity.. But the way you are putting your idea is a mere call for reverse-oppression. We should aim at having a balanced society where people are treated equally and humanity is appreciated with no regards to sex. Your approach to the problem is likely to deepen the lack of mutual understanding and increase the state of alienation based on sex. We want to reduce the role of gender-based considerations in our social structure and not the contrary.

Try to be a little more objective. I suggest that you google "Katherine MacKinnon" and read some of her essays/interviews.

Cheers,
Omar

Nilegirl said...

Fantasia, I sort of agree with Omar and Eyad. You have strength which is good. What you say in your "About" section is definitely encouraging. But when you go to such extremes and generalizations as you do in your posts you can easily turn ppl off. Your points may have some validity but end up sounding like you have a personal vendetta to settle.

Fantasia said...

Thanks to you all for coming by and leaving your comments. I am so glad to see many people interested in what I wrote. This is a very positive sign.

Fantasia said...

the alien:
Thanks for "men r not going to change this situation, they do not want to loss the power they have." This coming from a man is priceless. It is good news that you believe men will be interested to read what I write here. I just didn't want to hurt anybody's feelings. After all, I am a woman and I respect the feelings of others, no matter who they are.
Thanks for your encouragement which I didn't receive from as many girls here as I had hoped for.

Fantasia said...

Bassam:
Nice to know that guys aren't mad at me. Thanks also for your encouragement.
Seems you don't like pink! I'll keep the color for 2 reasons:
1. I like it, although I know guys consider it sassy.
2. The color pink is a symbol of the feminine, like the pink ribbon for breast cancer.

Fantasia said...

eyad:
I believe you didn't read the warning I had on the very first post. This is a NO MAN ZONE. You enter at your own risk.
If you think what I express here is a negative energy, then look around you in real life and think again.

Fantasia said...

sokoothansawat:
Thanks dear. Your blog was worthy of visiting.
I just wanna calrify that I'm looking for no amazon or anything.
A low class woman has all the right to think the world of her man, cause her degree of consciousness is limited and her financial independence too. She can beaten by her husband and view it as his right. What about you? Can you take something like that?

Fantasia said...

cesario:
Unite! Yeah, yeah.. whatever. Believe me it's not us who are against unity. But a unity based on equality and mutual respect. Can men handle that?
Thanks for adding your opinion anyway. You are always welcomed.

Fantasia said...

Omar:
We can spend a lifetime talking about how the world is supposed to be, but that won't lead us anywhere. What we can actually do is to deal with reality in the best possible way. That's how I view it. Of course you will disagree with it, your right.
Catharine MacKinnon is a humanitarian more than a feminist. I like her views, but she never dealt with Egyptian society.
Thanks for your comment.

Fantasia said...

nilegirl:
I wanna assure you that I have no personal vendetta at all. I just talk facts not fiction. I am true to the message I stated in my "About" section, but through methods that work. Being the only angels among the demons will lead us nowhere. We have to deal with the world the way it is. That's not extreme, just realism.

Bassam said...

Fantasia,
what I meant about the color, is that it's the society representation of the female, they wanna see her in pink, they want her to be sassy, they want her to be a "girl"

in my humble opinion, the breast cancer ribbon was chosen to be pink, just to appeal to the traditional representation of women

they didn't want to be controversial because they needed to gather as much support as possible to fight the breast cancer, so for them it was a smart choice.

anyway, since you do like the pink color, I guess you should keep it

it was just an argument

Good luck and keep the good work

Fantasia said...

Thanks Bassam. I don't think there is a sassy color and another that is not. Even if it is traditionally viewed to be so, we should work on changing the idea, not the color itself.

Eyad Harfoush said...

Dear Fantasia,
I am not offended with what I have read here, because in general I welcome diversity, but the job I had one day enabled me to see the cornerstone of human being psychological stability, I found it the degree of balance in his relation, attitude, satisfaction with the opposite sex. It is the code of the world God created.

What I meant finally is that feminism is a fair case, and equity is achievable mission, but anti-male fanacism is unfair, and will not gather even ladies around your movement (with some exceptions with some scars of course). Greetings & regards afterall

اجندا حمرا said...

Hey fantasia
such a strong statement
i agree with u ,we as women specially in the arab world r more of passives than active creatures
not all of us but the majority and it is great to know and hear somone talking in a different way trying to empower us as women and it is good when it comes from a woman like us
cause sometimes women tend to have jealousy goin on between them
it is healthy to be jealous but in a more productive way
we dont live in this world alone and it is much better to gather and empower each other
we dont need the approval of men or them telling us we r good
we have to feel this goodness within ourselves like they say always we have to love ourselves first before we start learning to love each other
i think it comes naturally when u love yourself u will also love others
we r not against men we r just against injustice and what they say that we r weak without men and we cant go on in life without them because we can
strength comes within the person not a gift from someone whether male or female
thank u for allowing me to speak my mind
good luck with your blog ,it is very interesting:-)

Fantasia said...

eyad:

Well, every feminist has her approach I guess, and this is mine. It is my nature not to go on wasting my time with ideals that have no place in the real world. I tend to be pratical. The reality is ugly, and we have to deal with it. This is the best possible way in my point of view. I'm not a fanatic, I know that. I just talk about things the way they really are, not how they are supposed to be. My name is fantasia, but I am very very realistic.

Fantasia said...

Agenda:

Your words are so empowering. I wish all girls think like you do. But unfortunately most of them settle for whatever their society offers, without caring to fight for their rights, even if this means a better life. The only care to win the acceptance of others, even if they lose their personalities and dignity. They can't honestly look at themselves in the mirror and see how marginalized they have become. I feel so sorry when I see the female condition in Egypt. We have a long history, and our women could have gained a very good position as compared to other civilizations which went on the path of women liberation long after us. It is very sad.
But girls like you give me hope. That's why I think it is not enough to have such insight, you have an obligation towards your sex. Talk and let the world hear you.

اجندا حمرا said...

Fantasia,
dont forget my dear that not all girls can support themselves..maybe those who cant settle for less and agree to the first guy knocking on their door.
sad but true...
i think girls also like u give me hope too that not all females in egypt accept what society embarks upon them jus because they have to follow society
i think we r trying here to expess ourselves and to tell the world we exist and we r not weak right?

Fantasia said...

agenda:
This is the exact message here. We need to be heard. We need to change the negative image that society is making of all its females. We need to spread awareness among girls to avoid being reduced into dolls.

Miss Egyptiana "Trapped Soul" said...

i agree with you fantasia - your comment on eyad -

there is no time, or energy, or good in philosophizing things... women start to have their freedom by an action...

so searching for the hidden motives in the subconcious of the primitive society that start to know fire when the trees fell over the bridge of the inner self, while the ego was swimming in the sky... to the end of all this bla bla bla- is not by any mean needed here

we are women who suffered for long, from a father, a brother, a boy freind, a manager, and colleagues, even men in the street look at us as low second degree creatures ... we need to talk

and even if it is a discharge of negative energy... mashy ya sidi why not, we purify ourselves and set the base of our vision ... no to inequality ... no to the race who think they are dominating us with their ...... :)

اجندا حمرا said...

fantasia
i totally agree with u ,we should reach girls to aware them of their rights and to avoid them being reduced into dolls but let me ask how we can reach those girls who dont have the previlege of having the internet ,not everybody now gets it
there r girls who r new to all of this
they need education ,they need us to get them back their self respect and self confidence after being reduced for such a long time into dolls
we should start with the girls who dont have most of the previleges of other girls like simply the internet

Fantasia said...

egyptiana:
This is what I truely seek after; that is, a practical approach to deal with female issues in our society. I am not here to preach about the perfect life, how life is supposed to be, and the beauty of equality. I am after introducing methods that work, methods that would help a woman regain her stolen self-confidence and pride, methods which will enable women to know their rights and fight for them. Thank you for giving me the chance to rephrase it here.

Fantasia said...

Dear agenda,
You have introducing a very important point here. We should reach out to those girls who don't use the net. I agree with you. I believe the first step is to throw back our fear of speaking our minds out loud. Many girls hide what they truely think, they are afraid to seem odd if they talk about freedom and female rights. Even in friendly conversations, the opinion of the majority takes over, so that when a girl has a different message to deliver, she is so reluctant to do so. If we truely believe we are right, we shouldn't be afraid to spread this awareness and share it with everybody, especially those who traditional and don't see how society is killing their spirits.
I am starting with the internet community, cause it is a shame to find the majority of the girls who are supposed to be well-educated and who use technology, have a very narrow view when it comes to their lives and their achievements. I believe changing their minds is as challenging as reaching out for the others.

اجندا حمرا said...

Dear Fantasia
i totally agree with u dear...we should start by the internet community
so many girls use th internet to chat without a specific goal..some just use it to have a boyfriend and that's it..although they can make the best out of the internet in discussing useful things and start to be aware about their rights and how to express themselves in a much bettr way
u talked about a very important issue,how some girls even during friendly conversations tend to hide their opinions thinking that because it can differ from the majority in the group so she shouldnt express it
this gradually takes from their right to express themselves and finally they wont be able to say how they feel and eventually will not get in touch with their rights
sure changing minds and traditions and the way girls r raised in the arab countries is as challenging as reaching out for others

Fantasia said...

Dear agenda,
I see we're on the same page here. You said it, girls don't care to improve their conditions. They live in a world of dreams and when they finally wake up it becomes to late to change anything. My aim is to save them the pain of an ugly experience which will ruin their lives and leave them helpless. If they gained this kind of awareness early in their lives they will focus on building themselves and seeking their independence. Only then can they make better choices in life.

اجندا حمرا said...

Dear Fantasia
yeah i think we r on the same page here but let me raise a point also...u mentioned u wanna save those girls from going through an ugly experience to save them its pain but let me tell u this dear and from my own experience belive me...take for example a girl who is engaged to a guy
he is not good and she has that intimate friend of hers who advices her that he is not good for her and that intimate friend happens to be single
the girl and most of them here in egypt starts to say u r single..u dont wanna see me happy
always when we r in love we r masked by that blind love and we dont listen to any advice
the same thing happens when u start advicing girls about their rights ..and tell them u dont wanna see them going through pain of an ugly experience
they start saying u r single u dont want to see anyone else happy in a relationship
people my dear dont usually listen to advice...as if they wanna go through the pain without knowing it's gonna lead them to it through the ugly experience they r living
i think sometimes this should happen
u always warn childern about the dangers of getting near electricity for example or matches but the child usually dont listen and he comes near it anyway if he is alone ,then he knows it gives pain and sometimes he gets away from it
im not saying we should stop advicing girls about their rights and how to make their lives much better but i do think the way of delivering the message is so very important to make it appear as if we really do care about their choices but at the same time we care more about their rights
to listen to us or not important but to be there is much important

Fantasia said...

agenda:
There will always be those who won't listen until they hit something in their lives which causes them much pain, then they will listen. But others are rational enough to see danger before jumping into it with their eyes blindfolded. My message is for both. You can't stop tragedies from happening, but ringing the alarm will always be the right thing to do.

اجندا حمرا said...

Dear Fantasia
you r right sometimes people dont listen even to advise given to them by their closet friends to save them from the pain but i guess some people unconsciously wanna gonna through the pain and u know what?pain sometimes acts as a great teacher for some people.
i think wise people see through the pain without going through it,they can see the signs
u said it right dear you cant stop tragedies but at least we can set the alarm in the hope that someone will listen and be careful

"When I dare to be powerful - to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid" - Audre Lorde